


Morning Routine

by Monsieur_Grenouille



Category: Christian Bible
Genre: Husbands in love, Jesus is quirky, Judas is a grump, M/M, Wholesomeness, Written in like fifteen minutes, modern day AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-03-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:48:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 521
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23224291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Monsieur_Grenouille/pseuds/Monsieur_Grenouille
Summary: Judas needs a little help getting on track when he wakes up.
Relationships: Jesus Christ/Judas Iscariot
Comments: 14
Kudos: 38





	Morning Routine

**Author's Note:**

> Although I’m currently Jewish, I was raised in a Christian household, so I know my fair share of the Bible. I needed to do something about this (extremely unnecessary) knowledge, so I’m writing Jesus x Judas (Jedas? Christriot?) fanfiction. It’s also late and I’m starting to get cabin fever from the quarantine, so I’m extremely loopy. 
> 
> Spot the really subtle Fall Out Boy reference!

“Wake up,” whispered Jesus, “It’s almost seven.” 

Judas groaned and covered his face with a pillow. “Good for you. Let me sleep.” 

“It’s Tuesday, baby. You gotta get up and go to work, like everyone else. Those lines of code aren’t gonna write themselves!” Jesus ripped the blanket off of his husband’s body, making him shiver in his fluffy pajamas. His emerald eyes opened to shoot a fierce glare at Jesus. 

“At least tell me there’s coffee made, or that you put in toast for me.” He sat up in bed and gave his husband a lazy kiss. Jesus’ baby blue eyes sparkled at him, suggesting he’d been up since a questionably early hour. 

“I made you coffee, and a bagel, and your outfit’s hanging on the doorknob over there, and I’ve already RSVP’d you to today’s meeting. I didn’t respond to the whole group, since people hate that, but at least your boss knows you’ll be there.” He curled around Judas and kissed him on the cheek.

Judas nuzzled him and chuckled, “You’re a saint.” 

Jesus cupped his lover’s face in his hands and touched their noses together. “I’m more than that, baby. You knew that already.” He leaped off of the bed and tugged at Judas’ arm. “C’mon! Get up! Get up! GET UP, FOR THE LOVE OF ME.” He dragged his husband out of bed, cringing when he hit the floor with a crash. “You alright?” 

Judas let out a pained sigh. “Yes. I’m alright. Natural consequences, am I right?” He got on his knees, then used his hands to lift himself up. In a flurry, Jesus shoved a clothing hanger and neatly folded dress pants into Judas’ arms. 

“Get dressed, baby, and when you come downstairs, your keys and wallet will be found.” 

“You’re the best, Jee. What would I do without you?” Judas threw on his clothes and fixed up his three-guard faux-hawk in the bathroom mirror. He used the boar brush to gently push through his spikes, throwing in some hair gel to spice it up a little. “Perfect,” he muttered, satisfied. He took his iron pills without water, which was a pretty expensive mistake. Coughing, he choked down some water. _I can still feel the pill in my throat_ , he shivered. 

He made his way downstairs, smiling when he saw his husband curled up on the couch, watching the news. “What was my dad thinking? Fires _and_ a disease? You’re supposed to do these things one at a time, Dad! One. At. A. Time! Like that ten plagues thing from a while back. That was fine, but– oh, hey, Judas! Your breakfast is on the counter. It’s late, so you might wanna get your stuff and go.” 

Judas laughed and grabbed his satchel, along with his bagel and coffee. He tucked his keys in one pocket, wallet in the other, held his phone in his hand, and draped his wireless earbuds over his shoulders like a stole. He kissed Jesus on the cheek, said, “Love you, see you after work!” and walked out the door in a hurry. 

What a divine husband he had. 

**Author's Note:**

> Clean comments, please.


End file.
